What do you look for in your partner?

Day 71

October 10 marks a big day in my life. On 10/10/10 I dared to walk out of my bachelor life and ask a girl at my favorite spot in Baltimore at around 10:00 pm “Will you marry me?” To my surprise, she just smiled and said “Yes”. I am dedicating this blog to this girl who brought an end to my reign of bachelor life. We got married a month from that and shared ours fights and laughter. Two years have passed by but I am happy that I dared to ask her the question that changed my life. One of the toughest decisions of our lives is choosing the right partner to spend the rest of our lives together. Finding the person is only part of the battle but having the courage to express the feelings and getting back a mutual sentiment is another portion of the battle. The ability to remind yourself in times of happiness and sorrow that your partner completes your world - completes the battle.

So here is my question: What do you look for in your partner?

I sometimes wished finding the right partner was as simple like the poetic words that propose “A strike of lightening and weakening knees.” The theory of an ideal partner is finding a person that does not have the same personality like you to complete your completeness. The challenge of this theory is finding the common conjunction in the person whose personality is not the same as yours. There is another theory about choosing the ideal partner, the theory of love. This theory dictates on the measurement of love and that your partner must reciprocate the equal amount of love and feelings that your share with the person. Another interesting theory would be the theory of purpose, why do you want the other person in your life?

Do all humans look for the same characteristics in their partner? Does the perspective of choosing a partner depend on the gender, age, culture, value, etc. of the person? What are the implications of chemistry for choosing the right partner? Is there a dedicated or accepted time-frame with respect to analyzing a human for partnership? At what point do you decide to pursue the bond of friendship to a bond of partnership?  

Does a successful partnership guaranty a smooth sail? Do you think partners don’t fight or argue? In a partnership there will be times when we agree but there will be times when we don’t agree. Even though not a 100 percent successful, two of the biggest lessons I have learned to balance my partnership during times of dispute are the ability to focus the energy on understanding your partner and focusing the energy towards listening to encourage support to your partner. 

“I can only be a truthful storyteller about our love-hate relationship with you on-my-side forever to catch my lies” 

~Lenji Jacob